Yellow Bellies – Morgy & Sam Coleman Classic

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Found this is the April 1998 edition of “SPORTS Plus” which was a Free publication circulated in the Upper Hutt, Porirua and Kapiti Coast districts:

The article was written under the pseudonym of some cove calling himself “Grumps from Gramps”.

“Yellow Bellies, from Sam Coleman Classic

A recent event, drawing large numbers to the Trentham Camp Golf Club course, was the Annual Sam Coleman Golf Classic, restricted to entries from Yellow Bellies and burgling Ockers.

The feature of the prestigous event this year revolved around an incident involving well known Upper Hutt escort, Mike Morgan, aka Morgy.

It seems that Morgy had been over-watered the previous evening, or had picked up a bug from within a sausage so ably cooked a little on the raw side by chefs, Biggles and Morty, for consumption at the Bubbly Breakfast start to the day.

Anyway, on the second hole Morgy slipped a cog in his ring gear and soiled his jockies.

As the first move to disguise his embarrasment he disappears into Effing Forest to turn the stained clothing inside out. This lasted OK for another few holes when he noticed that for some reason his mates where taking a different approach to the Hole. Morgy being quite quick with the brain picks up that he has been given away by the surrounding cloud of flies.

In another effort to hide his dilemma he throws all caution to the wind and was observed washing his smalls in one of the puddles so fortuitously dug out by well known ditch digger Paddy Roil a few days beforehand. This saw him out to the 18th where, unlike normal practice, our friend Morgy quickly departed without so much as a good bye.”

Morgy also features on the Yellow Bellies Honours Board for “Courage on the Field”. We were playing the Jugglers at Ngati Toa Domain when with a large cracking sound poor old Morgy hits the deck. Unfortunately he had broken his ankle. An Ambulance was called but took quite some time to arrive. In the meantime it was pissing down with rain. To shelter  Morgy he was covered with a large tarpaulin and the rest of his mates repaired to the Bar in the Clubrooms. We did however keep a close eye on him and provided him with the odd Ale or two while waiting for the Ambulance.

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